I don't like failing, but on this occasion I've realised there's no choice. And strangely, I'm not in the slightest upset by it.
Before Xmas came upon us, I'd decided to give myself a couple of days off from writing. Just two, nothing excessive, only a little break to recharge over the festive season.
No chance! Not a hope.
I lasted a couple of hours at most. Then my mind wandered to a new plot I've been thinking about for a tvdetective book. Some fresh ideas sparked. And there I was, grabbing a pad and busily writing them all down.
As so often happens, the momentum built. One idea beget another, then another, and it was like the snowball tumbling down a mountainside. Before I knew it, I'd been happily scribbling away for an hour.
Right, I think - now that's done I shall have a break.
And then... another hour or so later, up pops yet another idea - this time for a teaching exercise (on finding your voice as an author, in case you're interested) and I'm writing away again.
It made me reflect upon the impossiblity of having a break when you've been seduced by the writing thing. It really is like falling in love. You can't leave her alone. And happily, so very delightfully, she loves you right back and absolutely refuses to play it cool, too.
In a way, it's a little frustrating. But only a little. Never getting a break is a small price to pay for all the joy writing brings me (if not necessarily my readers!)
It's why I always keep a notebook, or at least piece of paper and pen with me everywhere. The old brain never stops chewing over thoughts and ideas, and can come up with a good one when least you expect it.
I would say about the only time it switches off is when I'm asleep, but even that's not true. Commonly, when I awaken in the morning, I find my mind full of ideas and have to scawl them all down before doing anything else.
The only explanation can be that the brain thing has been working away overnight, but been forced to wait to reveal them until I'm conscious again.
It's yet another curiousity of this writing life, the inability to ever have a break, even at Xmas. But, do you know what?
I wouldn't change it for anything.